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"One thing I hope I'll never be is drunk with my own power. And anybody who says I am will never work in this town again....

"A celebrity is any well-known TV or movie star who looks like he spends more than two hours working on his hair." Tweet ...

"You're nuts but you're welcome here." Tweet "Writers block is a fancy term made up by whiners so they ...

"A day without sunshine is like, you know, night." Tweet "I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful, na...

All hell's going to break loose. "Better to starve free than be a fat slave." -Aesop Tweet "There, I guess ...

Big girls need big diamonds. I am a very committed wife. And I should be committed too - for being married so many times. I don...

I blinked and I cured my brain. Can't is the cancer of happen. Let me say this about the Goddesses, I don't think the term is ...

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"They're break-dance fighting." - Mugatu "Moisture is the essence of wetness, and wetness is the essence of beauty....

"Just when I thought you couldn't possibly be any dumber, you go and do something like this... and totally redeem yourself!...

"I guess the foot's on the other hand now, isn't it, Kramer?" - Striker "Mostly, I remember the nights when w...

The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending, then having the two as close together as possible. Tweet Thi...

I'm very pleased to be here. Let's face it, at my age I'm very pleased to be anywhere. Tweet This If it's a good scr...

I look to the future because that's where I'm going to spend the rest of my life. Tweet This I smoke ten to fifteen cigars a...

Happiness? A good cigar, a good meal, a good cigar and a good woman - or a bad woman; it depends on how much happiness you can handle. ...

Acting is all about honesty. If you can fake that, you've got it made. Tweet This At my age flowers scare me. Tweet This Be q...

A man is hit by a car while crossing a Beverly Hills street. A woman rushes to him and cradles his head in her lap, asking, "A...

My doctor recently told me that jogging could add years to my life. I think he was right. I feel ten years older already. Tweet Th...

Any time a person goes into a delicatessen and orders a pastrami on white bread, somewhere a Jew dies. Tweet This He's so ol...

We loved with a love that was more than love. Edgar Allan Poe What the world really needs is more love and less paper work. Pearl Baile...